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Top bit of trolling there. Well done.

Not sure how me taking the piss out of your doom and gloom equates to me getting my knickers in a twist. But then, as is increasingly obvious from our own message board, a lot of Woking fans these days don't seem to have any sense of perspective.

I'll keep that in memoriam. Sorry, in memorandum.

And you need to stop soiling yourself.

True enough. Mark Ricketts has been great for us over the last seven years, but he'll be 32 in October, and on the evidence of last season, his best days are definitely behind him. Don't think we tried too hard to keep him.

Pantywaist.

Proven goalscorer, good all-round player who works hard at shutting defenders down, strong in the air, decent on the ground, defends well at opposition corners and free-kicks. His only real weakness was a lack of pace, so he plays best with a nippy little striker alongside him. Don't really...

Sounds as if Eastleigh are ceremoniously unveiling Scott Rendell as their new signing at six o'clock this evening...

Some clubs are discreet, others leak like a sieve. If, for example, the Aldershot manager writes in his programme notes at the end of the season that he's had a playing budget of £500k for the season, there isn't really much reason to doubt the figure.

Only 255k? Damn, that's only 5k above third-placed Braintree's budget last season. #doomed

I'm sure that Dale Vince will take whatever legal action he feels is appropriate. Let's face it, he's not exactly a stranger to the courts, is he? #desertedhisfamily

But he's leaving because we chose not to offer him anything.

You were moaning at him for being there, now you're moaning at him for not being there. You've obviously been listening to that drunken fuckwit Kingfield Ender...

Chris Arthur signs for Crawley. You have to laugh really.

Good keeper, his only real weakness is that he tends to stay on his line when crosses come in. Anyway, a massive improvement on Phil Smith.

Same with us and Harry Arter. Just about to start his seventh season at Bournemouth. Not sure we can wait much longer for him to be sold!

Please say it's Chris Arthur...

Maybe Cooper's planning on playing without a goalkeeper. Now that really IS showing a commitment to total football.

He sounds a bit of a tosser.

You live in Basingstoke and you support Aldershot. How high can your standards be?