Best Feature or Game

Craig

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To present this award we have the avid contributor to these things, smat
 

smat

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Hello! Award winning playwright and actor Smat here.

I'll be honest, I'm thrilled to have been selected to present this award. My lazy 'no preferences' response to Craig when offered the choice of award to present surely deserved this thankless task.

As far as I'm concerned, these things are a complete waste of time. 1FF is, and has been since its conception (which happened after Pagnell closed down The Football Forum), a proud arena for honest discussion about football, serving as a backdrop for our main pursuit; wanton misogyny and homophobia, enabled (and indeed sometimes delivered) by the forum administrators in a welcome and timely blow against political correctness. Games and Features are an unwelcome distraction. (nb the Premier League Prediction Game isn't shit because this involves genuine skill and excellent football knowledge).

Therefore there is a very real chance that I have never clicked on any of the threads I am about to now name in the top three Pretend Things For Sad Twats To Participate In Via PM, so bear with me if I get a few details wrong.

Click the spoiler tags to reveal the podium! (Nice touch, Stagat)

In third place...

It's The Gameshow Marathon! Yes! The Gameshow Marathon!

Well! What is there to be said about The Gameshow Marathon that hasn't been said before? It's a Marathon that has something to do with Gameshows. Things like Who Wants To Be A Millionaire? and Only Connect were perhaps mentioned in the 1FF forum feature we all like to call The Gameshow Marathon. Did this have something to do with "reformed, honestly" Nazi collaborator and ruddy-faced manchild Oaf? I'm not sorry if it wasn't.

In number two (an apt intro for this pile of absolute fucking shit)...

Sheep!

Now, this I have heard of! And then some!

Although, despite it having been a stalwart of forum life for many years now, I still have absolutely no idea what this feature is. I believe Rammy runs this? Or ran it? Or, wait, hold on... do I just think that because he's a Derby County fan, and I've associated Championship side The Rams with Sheep? Is it Craig who runs this? I didn't ask for this.

The WINNER of 1FF's Best Feature or Game is...

SHOUTBOX FEUDS! You did it, Posh Hammer! You did it!

Hahahahhahaha just kidding. You are genuinely a moron, Posh Hammer.

The real winner is, of course, The Food World Cup!

"""LIKE TO VOTE"""

Devised by and managed with FIFA-esque aplomb (and honesty???) by Martino Knockavelli, this game was similar to the World Cup in format, but involved food instead of football sides. Unfortunately, the curtain came down rather sooner than most World Cups for undisclosed reasons, and we will never know who the winner was going to be. In this weather, for me, it's got to be a hot mug of creamy tomato soup. Perhaps use the rest of this thread to make your own suggestions. Well done Martino Knockavelli for your winning feature.

This concludes my presentation.
 
Last edited:
D

Dr Mantis Toboggan

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i believe stagat started sheep

good presentation though well done smat x
 

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