Most tinpot thing I ever heard. (tinpot thread)

[rudebwoyben]

Not sure it's really at a full tinpot level, but I went to watch us at Barnet about 7 years ago. Got there earlier than normal so got in the ground as soon as the turnstiles opened at 2pm. Went to get a coffee but was told I had to go back at 2.30pm when the water would be hot.

That just fully illustrates the limitations of Underhill as a venue for spectators.

 

[Luke Imp]

Limited, but brilliant.

I liked the garden gazebo to the right of the away terracing.

 

[rudebwoyben]

The Colin Montgomerie stand we called it!

 

[shoddycollins]

I'm going for tinpot and really weird .

Made even weirder when you look on Youtube to see who the Wealdstone Raider actually is and realise that this is the reason for the whole link.

 

[THE TERRACEMAN]

Did the other hooligans expect that Derby's firm were among the Burton away fans? I know Derby were pretty infamous back then. I suppose most of these fellows had police looking out for them at the top-flight games their own teams were playing in.

That would be the DLF as they are known. No ides really Shoddy. We use the same stewards as Derby and have done for a few years so thankfully they are not seen at the Pirelli too often.
Another tinpot story is from the 1974/75 FA Trophy semi-final 1st leg, we took 2 special trains and over 3000 fans to the 1st leg away at Matlock. During the game whilst Albion fans were in full voice and kicking the back of the stand, it fell off, the entire length where the Albion fans were totally fell off and during the crush to get out at the end of the game, the turnstiles which had some sort of shed structure around them became isolated islands as the wooden structure completely disintegrated.

 

[yellow]

Losing an 'advisor' after four days because you didn't actually offer him a contract is quite tinpot, right?

 

[mnb089mnb]

Not sure it's really at a full tinpot level, but I went to watch us at Barnet about 7 years ago. Got there earlier than normal so got in the ground as soon as the turnstiles opened at 2pm. Went to get a coffee but was told I had to go back at 2.30pm when the water would be hot.

I was at one non-league game (I can't even remember where), and I asked for some chips and the woman behind the counter asked the other one to peel some potatoes.

 

[Railway Blue]

Back on topic though. Non-league toilets, and on the topic of being able to watch the game from the loo, I give you Horsham.

You'll have bogs like that in the Conference Prem next season if AFC Fylde come up.

 

[mnb089mnb]

Danny Baker Show in the 90s used to have some great calls on these sorts of subjects.

I remember one of a youth/schools game where it was raining so hard that the guy who was supposed to be refereeing decided to do it from his car parked on the halfway line. He'd beep his horn for a foul and use his indicators to indicate which way the freekick was awarded.

Another story told of a referee who forgot his whistle but managed to find a recorder from a nearby house in order to signal freekicks. This is what football is all about.

 

[THE TERRACEMAN]

I used to play in the Ashbourne and district Summer league way back in the 70's and 80's. A tinpot thread all of its own.
Most of our home games we had to get the cows off the pitch before kick off, great sliding into cow pats when tackling ! Our only place to wash was a cow trough and we got changed on hay bails in a barn.
Our ground had an old railway embankment on one side, once when we were entertaining Pastures hospital(mental institution), the ball went over the embankment for a throw to them, the full back went to retrieve the ball but seemed to be taking a long time, on investigation he had run about a field and a half away ! They had to bring on the sub. We won the game 17-0 but in the last minute our centre half saw the ball out for a goal kick and shouted "goal kick ref" to which the ref replied "no, I think we'll have a penalty !" which after much humour was despatched over a hedgerow !
One match was held up to get my mates dog and a large hawthorn bush he was dragging behind him moved.
We once played at Biggin up near Buxton, after they cleared the sheep off the pitch, we were surprised to find a drainage ditch running across the halfway line, this meant one half of the pitch was about 9 inches higher than the other.
Lastly we had a game at Brassington postponed in May due to 4" of snow on the pitch. When we did turn up to play later in the year the ref had forgot his flags, he asked the home sides linesman if he had a hankee or something similar so he could run the line, his reply had us in stitches " its owrayt ref, arl use big leaf off tree" and promptly pulled a leaf off a horse chestnut tree close by !
Games were played Monday and Thursday evenings and I remember those days fondly, we won the league and the cup in my time.

 

[THE TERRACEMAN]

Just a couple more Ashbourne and district Summer league stories. On numerous occasions during our games one season the ref had to stop play and have a word with our star striker due to the fact he still had a fag on the go from the half time break.
During a match at Marston Montgomery I pushed the ball past the full back and I ran past him on the other side, I made it ok but the ball didn't as it was stuck in the middle of a giant thistle that had been obscured from my view by the full back !
This one was quite a painful memory for me, but playing against Severn/Trent water, we had 2 brothers in our side who are still mates today, one played the ball out to the other on the wing, he crossed it and yours truly buried it in the onion bag, unfortunately their dad who was playing centre back for the opposition took my standing leg from under me, breaking it in the process ! Talk about a family conspiracy !

 

[rudebwoyben]

Keep up with these stories the Terraceman, they're great!

 

[THE TERRACEMAN]

Keep up with these stories the Terraceman, they're great!

Cheers, glad you liked them, I'll tell you it was an experience playing in that league, it was a hard league to put it mildly, most teams consisted of the local farm workers, village lads built like brick outhouses and we did well as several of our players worked down the pit or were Rugby players keeping their fitness levels up through the summer. I can remember our full back's toupee coming off one game, players bitten by a stray dog, bullocks storming the pitch causing a bit of a hold up until they were herded off elsewhere, trouble was when things like that happened it was almost dark when the game finished !
A few years ago I was at some ones house when the Police came round, nothing serious, witness statement or something, anyway the officer was doing his duty and he looked up at me and said did you used to play football, "yes" I said, "for Swan Sports at Draycott in the Clay ?" he enquired, "that's right". I said, "You used to be my footballing hero when you played Striker for them when I was a lad" In that instant I remembered him(knew his mam n dad) as one of the young lads who used to watch us at home. Never knew I was a hero until then !

 

[shoddycollins]

Cheers, glad you liked them, I'll tell you it was an experience playing in that league, it was a hard league to put it mildly, most teams consisted of the local farm workers, village lads built like brick outhouses and we did well as several of our players worked down the pit or were Rugby players keeping their fitness levels up through the summer. I can remember our full back's toupee coming off one game, players bitten by a stray dog, bullocks storming the pitch causing a bit of a hold up until they were herded off elsewhere, trouble was when things like that happened it was almost dark when the game finished !
A few years ago I was at some ones house when the Police came round, nothing serious, witness statement or something, anyway the officer was doing his duty and he looked up at me and said did you used to play football, "yes" I said, "for Swan Sports at Draycott in the Clay ?" he enquired, "that's right". I said, "You used to be my footballing hero when you played Striker for them when I was a lad" In that instant I remembered him(knew his mam n dad) as one of the young lads who used to watch us at home. Never knew I was a hero until then !

hah, Draycott in the Clay... been there. Used to work for a company that had a lot of work in the East Staffs area. Actually drove past it at the weekend as I was on the A50. I kept my eyes peeled for landmarks I might recognise and seeing Draycott church on the top of the ridge was one of them.

 

[THE TERRACEMAN]

That's Hanbury church, St Werburghs on top of the hill shoddy, Draycott is about 2 miles down in the valley and only has a chapel plus the famous(joke) Draycott fountain at the bottom of the cliff. The village is about 2 miles off the A50 on the A516. You drive past the Swan public house and that was where Swan Sports played in a field behind the pub. Sadly the team disbanded some years ago.
Impressed you knew where it was mind. Draycott Drifters as the lads from the village were named were infamous on the Northern Soul scene and still are to some degree !

 

[shoddycollins]

That's Hanbury church, St Werburghs on top of the hill shoddy, Draycott is about 2 miles down in the valley and only has a chapel plus the famous(joke) Draycott fountain at the bottom of the cliff. The village is about 2 miles off the A50 on the A516. You drive past the Swan public house and that was where Swan Sports played in a field behind the pub. Sadly the team disbanded some years ago.
Impressed you knew where it was mind. Draycott Drifters as the lads from the village were named were infamous on the Northern Soul scene and still are to some degree !

My memory is a bit vague to be honest... but I did remember Draycott had some relationship to that big long ridge. The A516 is the dead straight road right, that runs over the ridge and then to the A50? I certainly will have passed by said Swan as I must have visited every corner of East Staffs in the course of my work (as in I was specifically tasked with exploring the area and leaving no stone unturned).

My favourite discovery was a sandwich shop in Uttoxeter that did a cracking sausage sandwich.

Me and a friend (who didn't work for the same company, he just tagged along for the craic) got stuck in Fauld Crater, herded into some hollow by cows and also inadvertently broke into a Fireworks factory when trying to escape said hollow on one particular day.

 

[THE TERRACEMAN]

You've got it shoddy, we've gone well off topic but what the hell, Fauld crater, the biggest man made whole in western Europe ! That fireworks factory I'm pretty sure has also blown up ! Next time in Utch(Uttoxeter) try cheese and bacon oatcakes-manna from heaven !
I like the sound of that job, I've done something similar for over 50 years but never been paid to do it !
Those cows that herded you into some hollows may be the same ones whose shite I had stuck in my underpants after some particularly hearty sliding tackles during my halcyon days with Swan Sports !

 

[shoddycollins]

You've got it shoddy, we've gone well off topic but what the hell, Fauld crater, the biggest man made whole in western Europe ! That fireworks factory I'm pretty sure has also blown up ! Next time in Utch(Uttoxeter) try cheese and bacon oatcakes-manna from heaven !
I like the sound of that job, I've done something similar for over 50 years but never been paid to do it !
Those cows that herded you into some hollows may be the same ones whose shite I had stuck in my underpants after some particularly hearty sliding tackles during my halcyon days with Swan Sports !

We have but we can indulge. This was in around 2007, and myself and another guy from my company were writing a design guide for East Staffs Council. Basically it's a good-practice guide to urban design aimed at architects and developers, and which forms part of council planning policy such that whether the developer has referred to it can be a consideration in deciding planning permission. It is partly general good practice but also partly based on preserving local distinctiveness and discouraging 'could be anywhere' building. So my job involved travelling all over the Borough observing building materials, local architectural styles, street patterns, form, massing, fenestration, enclosure, all that stuff; making notes and taking photographs.

 

[THE TERRACEMAN]

Think my wife knows something about fenestration ! ESBC, must mean those just down the road from my house in the offices reserved for those with 6 digits and webbed feet !
On a more serious note that sounds really interesting occupation, myself and quite a few mates involved in the local building trade and obviously meet every requirement needed by ESBC !
I will return with more tinpot stuff from our non league days shortly.

 

[shoddycollins]

Here's something relatively tinpot, from the League of Ireland no less. It's my favourite ever 'asterisked' point at the foot of a league table, in an old (but not that old, 2003) Rothman's Yearbook I have. It goes.

*St Patrick's Athletic had 9 points deducted for fielding an ineligible player. The points were later reinstated. They then had a further 15 points deducted for fielding another ineligible player.

Fool me once...

They would have won the title that season too had it not been for the 15 point deduction.

 

[Aber gas]

Here's something relatively tinpot, from the League of Ireland no less. It's my favourite ever 'asterisked' point at the foot of a league table, in an old (but not that old, 2003) Rothman's Yearbook I have. It goes.

*St Patrick's Athletic had 9 points deducted for fielding an ineligible player. The points were later reinstated. They then had a further 15 points deducted for fielding another ineligible player.

Fool me once...

They would have won the title that season too had it not been for the 15 point deduction.

Can you imagine the shit the admin bloke must have taken after that ( rightly )

 

[Aber gas]

Ok I know they've made an appearance before but the the conference Twitter account attempting to engage in a bit of 'bantz' this evening has got be included , embarrassing

 

[shoddycollins]

Ok I know they've made an appearance before but the the conference Twitter account attempting to engage in a bit of 'bantz' this evening has got be included , embarrassing

Just twitter as a whole... the more tinpot a club is, the more active their twitter feed will be and the more it will read like it is being maintained by a bored thirteen year old boy.

 

[Aber gas]

Just twitter as a whole... the more tinpot a club is, the more active their twitter feed will be and the more it will read like it is being maintained by a bored thirteen year old boy.

There's people asking genuine questions about whether they'll need to change travel arrangements due to possible bt sport involvement and being given some 'witty' replies . What a crazy guy

 

[DarkSithLord]

There's people asking genuine questions about whether they'll need to change travel arrangements due to possible bt sport involvement and being given some 'witty' replies . What a crazy guy

On that subject does anyone know when BT Sport wil make their decision as who to show on the final day?

 

[Aber gas]

On that subject does anyone know when BT Sport wil make their decision as who to show on the final day?

Not sure DSL but don't bother asking the bellend who runs the conference Twitter feed

 

[Southern Shayman]

Can't believe they haven't sacked him/her - Vanarama can't be happy with that clown making a mockery of it.

There really needs to be some sort of petition started

 

[Bs14gas]

When playing in a local Bristol league in the early 90s,we let in 3 goals in the first 3 minutes,when one wag on our team started singing the first couple of verses of D'reams things can only get better and we all joined in at the kick off.the opposition were laughing so much we ran straight through and scored.still lost though.

 

[THE TERRACEMAN]

http://nonleaguescotland.org.uk/arniston.htm
The main stand at Arniston Rangers looks like it could do with a bit of repair work doing to it !

 

[Son of Cod]

http://nonleaguescotland.org.uk/arniston.htm
The main stand at Arniston Rangers looks like it could do with a bit of repair work doing to it !

Those gaps are quite clearly ergonomically considered viewing features designed for those that like that back few rows of the stand.