National League Fixtures - 18/8/2018

Pliny Harris

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For the first time I've been in town since we reformed, I'll be giving this one a swerve. Can't countenance having Simon Lenighan in our squad, someone who's attracted trouble a number of times and remains in some sort of public-facing work while I can't yet see satisfying evidence that he's moved on. I don't want violent misogynists at my club. Hoping we win and carry on our great start nonetheless, but ethics need firm action to back them up and I'd rather this second episode of having him on our books would be a short, sharp shock rather than dragging us through the muck for a prolonged period.
 

Benfcht

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We are poor but not through lack of effort and have been close in all our games, If your players take it easy we could surprise you. I doubt there is a 3-0 difference between the two squads, you’ve had a good start don’t get carried away. Plus I notice you’ve only between sides that will be down the wrong end come April. See Woking who sung about going up about 7 games in last season. You’ll probably win but not too comfortably, quote a 5-0 win tomorrow:)
My thinking for the 3-0 prediction was the fact we beat Maidstone at home 3-0 and they beat you at your own ground. I know that’s not how football works but I like to apply some logic to my predictions. Peter Taylor will always demand hard work from his players so not surprised about that. We won’t take it easy on you, our manager is extremely grounded and hard working. If we play like we have in the first 4 games then we’ll win comfortably imo unless you pull out a worldy performance.
 

Soup Ladle

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Brotherhood preview:

As the members of the hood continue into their combined 16th season in the abyss, their tour of tinpot land continues unabated. First up, Wrexham who look to have another good side assembled travel to Eastleigh, with hopes of getting an away win. The travelling brothers are advised to turn up in the ground at around 2:28pm, as Eastleigh fan is taking the mic to outline his vision for their formerly bankrolled club for the rest of the season. It's easy to spot him whilst everyone else ignores him, he's the geeky speccy one in a Southampton shirt.

Orient have a big London conurbation derby with Boreham Wood. A total of at least 4500 broken records are expected to fill out three stands to chunter on about having the worst home record in the history of football (Pools run your money on that one). All of about 25 Watford fans are expected in the away end, doing unofficial scouting on hot prospects for the future, Jobi McAnuff and Joe Widdowson.

Meanwhile Manchester United er sorry I mean Chesterfield are travelling to $alford (I don't have a pound sign on my laptop). They have finally lost to a tinpot club but that hasn't put them off, a total of 45,000 Spireites are expected to attend the game. It's caused a logistic nightmare for the UK government, who under pressure from Martin Allen, have had to grant 12,000 emergency visas for day trippers from China and Thailand to attend. It is anticipated that Chesterfield fans will be posting on the match thread every two minutes to describe the latest throw in or long diagonal ball they've had to deal with, as has so far been customary this season.

Finally, winless Pools take on Theresa May United at home. Painfully having done the double on us last season, it's clearly not been forgotten by the pools players who are in no doubt that 'we are going to smash them'. It's a constant source of bemusement how Pools never ever learn from their mistakes, but it's just as well, we haven't been able to afford new wallpaper for the away dressing room so Niko Muir's comments in the Hartlepool Mail have just been plastered all over it instead, courtesy of the part time Maidenhead players and manager looking for extra cash.

Should mention long lost brothers plying their trade outside this hellhole in the even bigger one the level below. Stockport take on Bradford City (?), or at least that's who it should be. York continue their staggering regional league incompetence against Big Dave FC at home and Torquay, smarting from a midweek defeat look to get back on proper club track away at Slough.
 

Fyldefan

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For the first time I've been in town since we reformed, I'll be giving this one a swerve. Can't countenance having Simon Lenighan in our squad, someone who's attracted trouble a number of times and remains in some sort of public-facing work while I can't yet see satisfying evidence that he's moved on. I don't want violent misogynists at my club. Hoping we win and carry on our great start nonetheless, but ethics need firm action to back them up and I'd rather this second episode of having him on our books would be a short, sharp shock rather than dragging us through the muck for a prolonged period.

Is that the rapist?
 

Benfcht

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Is that the rapist?
Technically not although he did film his mate raping a woman. Also assaulted 3 women on the night of celebrating being found not guilty. He’s also starting today so I imagine it will be a little bit toxic at the shay today.
 

dobbo

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2-0 Wrexham after 13 mins, Manny Smith and an OG
 

Soup Ladle

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Breaking news...

I'm hearing reports of an indirect free kick to Chesterfield deep inside their own half. It's taken short to the right back.
 

Southern Shayman

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Dagenham are absolutely diabolical, but we’ve somehow managed to let them score
 

Soup Ladle

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This is an incredibly boring football match

Not attending games is one of the benefits of having a broken foot.

Sounds quality on the radio, crowd seem to be really getting behind the lads.
 

Urban

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As expected, we’re losing.

Fuck the lot of them off and announce relegation. This is fucking awful.
 

Soup Ladle

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Oh my god Pools have scored
 

Soup Ladle

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Meanwhile in Salford, Man U winger Curtis Weston has just re-adjusted his shin pad and turned at a 75 degree angle to face a Salford goal kick.
 
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I've just realised, as it stands, we're below Harrogate and Solihull. Meanwhile the two teams that got autos over us in League One a few years ago are in the Prem or chasing promotion to the Prem. One of them has an old Orient assistant manager in charge, whom we sacked.

Fml.
 

Master D

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Chesterfield firmly camped in enemy territory right now.
 

Leewilson

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It's my weekly we're going down post.

Fuck sake. We haven't even lost to anybody good which is what seals it.

Boreham, Maidstone, Aldershot and now Halifax. We've managed to be worse. Goodness knows what will happen when the decent sides play us.
 

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