Worst excuses you have heard for someone being late/missing work

[hbk4894]

What are the worst excuses you have heard for someone missing or being late for work?

 

[Luke Imp]

Dog ate the car.

 

[The Iron]

I drove to the place I'd rather work at by mistake.

 

[Stevencc]

Sorry, dass ich für meinen ersten Tag der Arbeit spät bin, aber auf dem Weg hierher habe ich vergessen , wie man Englisch sprechen , so dass es extrem schwierig war, nach dem Weg zu fragen.

 

[hodge]

Sorry, dass ich für meinen ersten Tag der Arbeit spät bin, aber auf dem Weg hierher habe ich vergessen , wie man Englisch sprechen , so dass es extrem schwierig war, nach dem Weg zu fragen.

Stierscheisse

 

[StagsForLife]

Overslept. Never goes down well.

 

[Lamby]

Some guy in my office was complaining of chest pains and crouched over a chair complaining he was having a heart attack. It was just cramp. I'm surprised he's not been sacked yet.

 

[PatchLatics]

Too busy posting a shit thread on 1FF is the best I have heard.

 

[Womble98]

I once forgot I was meant to start at 5, and my phone was dead. Because I'd never ever been late, always 10 minutes early, they thought something dreadful had happened.

 

[KevinMcallister]

having a morning wank and got caught in my zipper. was an excuse not by me

 

[blade1889]

Lad at school said the traffic was bad once. School weren't impressed as he lived down the road and walked to school.


Only time I've been late to work was my first ever day. IPod alarm decided to play up and not go off. Felt pretty sheep-ish to say the least. And they didn't believe me.

 

[markpvfc]

I was 3 hours late for work once when a crash ahead closed the road i was on and there was no way to get off, just had to sit and wait for it to be cleared.

 

[The Cards]

This guy said he was exhausted from his other job, needless to say he didn't last very long