1FF Wars

[Oaf]

3 Dicks and a Dom sign...

Liquid Snake – 13BR 3HP 1D6 – £220,000/£40,000 – Unconventional Survival

 

[Rammy]

 

[Magic]

Someone call the authorities. Quick.

 

[hodge]

Someone call the authorities. Quick.

Who you gunna call?

 

[The Hand of Dom]

Not Adam Johnson.

 

[hodge]

Not Adam Johnson.

 

[Oaf]

One final signing from week 2...

Team 6 sign:

Goofy [Disney] – 10BR 3HP 1D6 – £230,000/£25,000 – Shield

GAWRSH!

 

[Oaf]

Week 2 Fight Card!

Nostromo
Lightweight:
Trick or Treat Fight
1 vs 1

Mount Doom
Middleweight:
Hitman Fight:
Stag vs SBF

Winterfell
Heavyweight:
Epic Rap Battle:
1 vs 1

Tardis
Bonus (no limit):
Winner gets an 18BR+ character offer
Stag vs 1 vs 1 vs 1

Well, some stuff of note here...

Firstly, Mt Doom is up for grabs again, meaning that Stagnificent are automatically placed in that fight to defend their territory. And as it stands, the only fighter they have eligible to compete there is Meat Boy... unfortunate for them.

Secondly, it seems all fights this week have stipulations! Some descriptions:

Trick or Treat fight: The winner has a 60% chance of gaining 1hp and an additional 1BR... and a 40% chance of losing 2BR.

Hit Man fight: The winner of this match acquires a hitman. This hitman can be used to have a 60% chance to take 1hp off of an opposing teams character of your choosing.

Epic Rap Battle: BR and Dice don't matter here... it's all about rapping skills! Once both characters have been revealed, each team must write a short rap in one paragraph consisting of no more than 150 words, dissing the fuck out of their opponent and their team. I will then judge a winner. Points for being creative, funny and making the other guy look like a bitch. Standard stuff.

You can all have one spot on the regular card and then another character in the bonus match.

DEADLINE: 10pm Tomorrow.

 

[last request]

Mount doom

 

[last request]

Nostromo

 

[Oaf]

Nostromo

Sorry chap, only one spot on the regular fights and then you can go for the bonus as an additional one in the Tardis.

 

[last request]

Ah yeah, of course. I did read that, understand it....and then forget it :hesk:

 

[Stagat]

Tardis

 

[last request]

Tardis

 

[Leewilson]

Nostromo

 

[Oaf]

Week 2 Fight Card!

Nostromo
Lightweight:
Trick or Treat Fight
3DD vs T6

Mount Doom
Middleweight:
Hitman Fight:
Stag vs SBF

Winterfell
Heavyweight:
Epic Rap Battle:
GNC vs 1

Tardis
Bonus (no limit):
Winner gets an 18BR+ character offer
Stag vs SBF vs 3CC vs T6

 

[JoeJoeJoeJoe]

We haven't entered anything yet

 

[Spirederman]

BEAST WILL SPIT BARS AT WINTERFELL.

 

[Spirederman]

We gonna buss' ya,
We gonna truss ya,
Grim New Chavs are gonna cuss ya.
See your mum, she gonna suck ya,
My man Beast, don't make a fuss na,

na, na, na na, na na

Gonna spit bare bars,
Gonna send y'all to Mars
Gonna leave you with scars,
In the 1FF Wars.


Bbrrrrraap Bbrrrrraap.

Come at me fam.

ffs

 

[Spirederman]

Grim New Chavs.... We got dis shit locked down cuz.

 

[JoeJoeJoeJoe]

We gonna buss' ya,
We gonna truss ya,
Grim New Chavs are gonna cuss ya.
See your mum, she gonna suck ya,
My man Beast, don't make a fuss na,

na, na, na na, na na

Gonna spit bare bars,
Gonna send y'all to Mars
Gonna leave you with scars,
In the 1FF Wars.


Bbrrrrraap Bbrrrrraap.

Come at me fam.

ffs

You rhymed ya with ya

 

[last request]

 

[Rammy]

This looks like the best wedding ever.

 

[JoeJoeJoeJoe]

Tardis

 

[IanH]

Goofy into Nostromo

Nathan Blake to Tardis

 

[Oaf]

Ian dude, sssssh, you take the spot on the card in here... leave telling me who's in which fight to the PM's to keep it a secret!

We gonna buss' ya,
We gonna truss ya,
Grim New Chavs are gonna cuss ya.
See your mum, she gonna suck ya,
My man Beast, don't make a fuss na,

na, na, na na, na na

Gonna spit bare bars,
Gonna send y'all to Mars
Gonna leave you with scars,
In the 1FF Wars.


Bbrrrrraap Bbrrrrraap.

Come at me fam.

ffs

Appreciate the enthusiasm, but the actual rap battle part of it is supposed to be via PM and then I'll reveal them when the fight results go up! Otherwise your opponents will get to see what you're saying and burn the fuck out of you with a comeback. And who want's to be insulted in a rap battle? That'd just be mean.

 

[Oaf]

Anyway, proper update hopefully coming later tonight...

 

[Oaf]

THE CARD... REVEALED!

Nostromo
Lightweight:
Trick or Treat Fight
Elsa 3DD vs Goofy T6

Mount Doom
Middleweight:
Hitman Fight:
Super Meat Boy Stag vs Stay Puft SBF

Winterfell
Heavyweight:
Epic Rap Battle:
Beast GNC goes unopposed!

Tardis
Bonus (no limit):
Winner gets an 18BR+ character offer
Captain America Stag vs Mewtwo SBF vs Mario 3CC vs Nathan Drake T6

This week, Captain America is sat doing AMERICA stuff, when suddenly he stops and just starts staring forward. Meatboy asks him what's wrong, but Cap simply says that he is the gatekeeper, and asks if Meatboy is the keymaster.

Captain America has been ZUUL'd. So he's out of the Tardis fight and it becomes a triple threat!

 

[Oaf]

Week 2 Fight Card RESULTS!

Nostromo
Lightweight:
Trick or Treat Fight
Elsa 3DD vs Goofy T6

It’s an all Disney battle to start us off, here. Goofy has the 1BR advantage going into this thing, but surprisingly isn’t able to make it count. He ends up getting frozen solid by Elsas icey powers. And what’s worse is that he also has “let it go” stuck in his head, but can’t do anything about it because he can’t move. Poor dog.

Yes, Goofy is a dog. But a free dog, able to walk and talk and wear clothes, unlike Pluto, who is a slave dog who has to act like a dog and stay on a leash. What an unjust world the Disney characters live in.

So, does Elsa get a treat (a bonus +1BR and 1HP?) or a trick (losing 1BR)...?

She gets a...

Spoiler

TREAT!

Mount Doom
Middleweight:
Hitman Fight:
Super Meat Boy Stag vs Stay Puft SBF

Poor Meatboy was dragged into this without ever really having a chance, but tried anyway. But he got squished, as expected. One life down, 9,999 to go…

SBF gain a Hitman! It has a 60% of taking 1hp from a character of their choosing!

Winterfell
Heavyweight:
Epic Rap Battle:
Beast GNC goes unopposed!

Beast raps some sick ass lyrics, but nobody is there to hear them.

Tardis
Bonus (no limit):
Winner gets an 18BR+ character offer
Mewtwo SBF vs Mario 3CC vs Nathan Drake T6


The two Nintendo characters get all Nintendo fanboyish and team up to try to take out the Sony guy, but Nathan Drake manages to hold them off while, of course, saying some smart ass shit in the process. In the end though, Mewtwo says something about being nobodies slave or some such bollocks, and throws a shadow ball in Marios direction. Mario gets blasted, but it’s ok because he already had a mushroom so it only makes him small instead of killing him.

In the moment of distraction, Nate draws him shot gun, gets in close to Mewtwo and blasts his face off. Mewtwo is out! Mario runs at Nathan and tries his DEADLY jump on the head manoeuvre, but Drake slides to the side to dodge it, pulls his shotgun back up and pulls the trigger, blowing Mario to pieces. Nathan Drake wins!

For winning the fight, Team 6 are offered the chance to purchase...

Sauron – 20BR 5HP 1D6 – £1,600,000/£55,000 – The One Ring

I've not done the maths yet, but even with that win... I think he may be out of their price range...

 

[Oaf]

Summary:

GNC
Gain Winterfell!
Gain 150k!

3CC
Mario loses 1hp!

3DD
Elsa gains +2BR and +1HP!
Gain Nostromo!
Gain 100k!

STAG
Meatboy loses 1hp!
Lose Mount Doom!

SBF
Stay Puft gains 1BR!
Gain Mount Doom!
Gain Hitman (60% chance of dealing 1hp damage to a character of your choosing)
Gain 250k!
Mewtwo loses 1hp!

T6
Goofy loses 1hp!
Nathan Drake gains 1BR!
Gain Tardis!
Gain 400k!

Now time for me to FUCK UP THE OP while trying to update this shit.